The Minister for Agriculture is now the approved pimp for cattle.

by | Mar 2, 2011 | Just plain weird, Laugh? I pissed myself, Wasp likes these, Well I never. | 2 comments

Not one you would really ever dream of making up but rather humourous none the less.

I came across the following whilst having a browse through the latest batch of Statutory Instruments (which, as an aside are on course to set a record for the number made in one year) :

Statutory Instruments
2011 No. 454

Agriculture, England

Livestock Industries
The Bovine Semen (England) (Amendment) Regulations 2011

Made

19th February 2011

Laid before Parliament

24th February 2011

The Secretary of State, in whom the powers conferred by section 10 of the Animal Health and Welfare Act 1984(1) are now vested(2), makes these Regulations in exercise of those powers.

Use of teaser animals

6.  For regulation 21 substitute—
“Use of teaser animals

21.—(1) No person may use a teaser animal to assist in the collection of semen unless it is approved for that purpose by the Secretary of State.

Whoever would have imagined that a secretary of state would be approving these things?

More to the point, how does one approve a teaser animal and why would one want to have to approve the use of a teaser animal?

I can just imagine a plain brown folder appearing on his desk each morning full of full frontal “readers udders” shots of frisky little Fresians and fetching Jerseys fluttering their eyelashes complete with biography, interests and vital statistics.

I suppose its better than actually doing the collecting in person although there are quite a few in Government who ought to be sent to do that for the next 10 years as punishment for being complete twats.

2 Comments

  1. Bucko

    I laughed out loud at readers udders, but I’m at work so I quickly had to think of an excuse for the mirth.

    • Wasp

      I can just imagine your colleagues reaction if I had included a nice large udder shot as well in that post 🙂 Or would it have just confirmed their suspicions 😛